Reflections
by MaryRose
Summary: A retrospective of all five seasons of Charlie's Angels from Kris's point of view. I know she wasn't in the first season. Just read!
1. In San Francisco

Disclaimer: I don't own "Charlie's Angels" Spelling and Goldberg do. But I do like to write about the characters and have fun with them anyway.   
  
Chapter 1: In San Francisco  
  
I'm here in San Francisco. My family doesn't know. Well, that's not exactly true. They know I'm here. What they don't know is that I'm going to the Police Academy here. They think I'm going to graduate school. That was the plan, after all. After I graduated college, I'd go onto graduate school and become some kind of teacher. That's what the money Jill sends me is for. Jill's my older sister by four years. She especially is sold on the idea of my becoming a teacher. She's not a teacher. She went to the Police Academy herself, but she doesn't want me to. I asked her once "Why not?" and she said she preferred a safer profession for me. She said that I had a gift for teaching. I'm not sure I agree. Look, I'm the least athletic person in our whole family, but that doesn't mean I can't be a good police officer. Jill's good at it. Why shouldn't I be?  
  
Don't think it's some competition thing with my sister and me. It's not. Okay, maybe a little... I love my sister a lot, but sometimes I do feel like I'm not measuring up to her. There's some honesty for you, huh? But it's more than that. Teaching is a rather boring profession in my opinion. Don't get me wrong. It's an important profession, and we do need good teachers, and I respect teachers, but the fact that I think it's boring just tells me that it's not for me. If I really wanted to teach, I know I wouldn't be describing it as boring.   
  
Police work, on the other hand, appeals to me. It's exciting work...I think. I know it's also important, so I'm practicing a little deception. I'd like to think it's forgiveable because it is a harmless deception and I will prove myself in the end. I'm sure of it. My family, especially Jill, will be proud of me.   
  
***  
  
There is some irony here. I'm a police officer and Jill isn't one any longer. That's right. She's not a P.I., working for a Charles Townsend's agency. She seems pretty happy about it, which is good. I want her to be happy. I just hope when she finds out about me that she'll feel the same way. After all, I didn't do this to hurt anyone. I did it because it's the right thing for me. So, hopefully that will be enough.   
  
***  
  
I'm working Vice. It's only temporary, but I did arrest a woman who later hanged herself in her cell. Man, I don't understand that. It wasn't such a big deal, was it? Maybe it was. I don't know. I don't know the kind of life she had. I don't know what her problems were. All I know is I did my job. I'm sorry she died. Now, however, I know more than I did before. This job is tough. It's not just excitement and glamor. Well, I never really thought it was glamorous, but you get the point.   
  
Can I do it? I hope so. I'd like to think I can. I do think I can. It's just like life. There are rough patches along the way. I can handle it, though. I know I can. That's all I'm gonna say for now. 


	2. In Los Angeles

In Los Angeles

            Guess what? I'm now working for the same P.I. firm that Jill was working for. Yes, that's right. I'm now doing what my sister was doing. Guess I'm destined to always follow in her footsteps. Just one thing, though. Jill's not here any longer. That's right. My big sister has gone off to Europe to become a race car driver. That's one thing I don't think I'll follow her in doing, thank you very much. But it is very exciting.

            However, that meant that there was a vacancy in the agency. Jill recommended me for the job. Can you believe that? I can't. When she found out what I had done, she—well let's just say she didn't take it very well. Or so I thought. She must have had a change of heart because she did recommend me. Now that I think about it, shocked is the more appropriate word for me to use to describe my sister's reaction to my career change. She was less than thrilled, to put it mildly. 

            So, for her to then go around and recommend me to Charlie was really saying something. It means that she finally accepted my choice, that she loves and believes in me. That's important to me because I admit I've idolized her since, well, since forever. Ever since we were kids, all I wanted was to be like my big sister. So, it makes me feel very good and special that she feels this way. It is tangible proof. Yeah, I guess I needed it spelled out for me. What can I say? I'm kind of insecure. Jill is really something to live up to, so you can't blame me. 

            Anyway, moving on. I should probably tell what it's like to be there and work for Charles Townsend. It's unusual to say the least. My first case took us all the way to Hawaii.[1] Charlie had been kidnapped. Imagine my first day on the job and I'm called upon to rescue the boss. Well, not alone, and it took us more than a day, but you get the idea. But Charlie was rescued and I found out that the Angels, that's what he calls his trio of female P.I.s don't get to see him. Crazy as it sounds, I don't know what the person I work for looks like. Amazing. Well, I said it was unusual. Supposedly, it's for our safety. Charlie has a lot of enemies and it's not inconceivable that they might try to get to him through us. But Bosley gets to see him, so it doesn't seem fair to me. 

            Anyway, let me tell you about the people that I work with. Since I already mentioned Bosley, let me start with him. John Bosley is the office manager. He gets to see Charlie, as I've already mentioned. Like I said, I don't think it's fair, but what can you do? He's very nice. A bit on the blustery side. He's always harping about the budget and money. I suspect, though I can't ay for sure as I'm still too new that it's all just an act. 

Now I'm going to go on and tell you about the other two Angels. I was afraid that it would be hard for me to step into Jill's place with them. Later, they told me that they weren't sure about me either, then. But when they found out I was Jill's little sister, it was fine. They hardly remembered me, having only seen me once at their graduation from the Police Academy. That's right, Jill, Sabrina, and Kelly were in the same class and graduated together. 

So, I'm gong to tell you about Sabrina Duncan first. She's very smart and I consider her to be the brains of the field. Not that Kelly and are dumb; we're not. It's just that Sabrina has this knack for planning and using her brains to achieve the most desirable results. I think it's great. 

Now, for Kelly Garrett. She's got street smarts. She acquired them due to a hard life. Unlike Sabrina and I, who grew up in stable, happy families, Kelly grew up in an orphanage. But she overcame that rough background to become a very caring and loving individual. She really helped me out in my first days. 

As for my role here, I think I'm kind of the little sister. At least, that's the way everybody seems to treat me. It's kind of annoying, but there's not much I can do about it. Hopefully as time goes on, I'll prove myself and I will show them that I am more than just Jill's little sister. It'll probably just take some time.

I shot my first perp last night[2]. I had never fired my gun before, not even when I was on the police force. Oh, I'd fired it on the range of course. Every cop has to. It's different, though, when you actually shoot somebody. Besides, I hadn't been on the force very long before becoming an Angel. 

We were undercover at a home for unwed mothers, which was really a front for a baby selling operation. I had to shoot one of the employees of the man behind the operation or he would have shot me. It was horrible. I didn't kill him. I found out late that he'd be alright, but I didn't know it at the time. 

After I shot him, all I could do was just stand there. I was frozen. I couldn't let go of the gun or do anything. I wondered if I'd just stand there for the rest of my life. However, Sabrina was there for me and she really helped me. She comforted me, got the gun out of my hand, and just stayed with me until she was sure I'd be alright. It's very hard. I'm still kind of upset, but I know I will be alright. I'll get through it because I know I can. That's all there is to it. 

  


* * *

[1] See episode 23: _Angels in __Paradise_

[2] See episode 31: _Angel Baby_


	3. At the Agency

At The Agency

            Well, guess what? I just got back from Las Vegas. A case took us there.[1] Apparently somebody was killing employees of the _Tropicana hotel and casino. Frank Howell, the owner, hired us to find out who it was. We did, and it was a very, well, let's just say it was quite a case. Sabrina fell hard for him, but things didn't work out. And now we're back home and things are just back to normal. Well, as normal as it ever gets around here. Being an Angel is not conducive to a typical life. _

            Jill was back for a visit. She came back to tell me she was engaged to a fellow racecar driver.[2] She met Steve Carmody in Europe. At first, I wasn't so sure about him, but as it turns out, he was one of the good guys, except that it seems he had to get killed for that to be proven. So, we had to figure out what was going on. It wasn't just another case. It was personal. Trust me, I hate this. I hope Jill's going to be alright. She's strong, but this is so horrible. I'll do what I can to support her, but that's not going to be easy now that she lives abroad. But she's my sister and I love her and I'll always be there for her for as long as she needs me. 

            Something happened to me that I can't believe. I had amnesia for a little while.[3] It's not really clear to me how it happened, but it had to do with the fact that I was a witness to a murder. Yeah, me. I helped convinced him despite the memories not being clear. It was the scariest thing that had ever happened to me. I'm glad I helped put a bad guy away, but in my wandering around not knowing who I was or what I was going to do, I discovered something. First, the world can be a very scary place. Lots of angry places and dangers await the innocent, not that I'm particularly _innocent_, but you know what I'm trying to say, I hope. I know that that's no big surprise, but it really hits you where you live when you're alone and vulnerable. However, I also discovered that there are happy places too.

            There are people out there who will take advantage of someone who is in trouble and try to hurt them in any way possible, however, there are also people out there who will go out of their way to try to help a person in trouble. In short, the world is made up of all kinds of people; good and bad. And I can survive in it, not only because I am strong, but because I have friends who love me as much as my family. Heck, they are my family. 

            It's funny, but even when we try to take a vacation we end up working. Sabrina, Kelly, and I went to visit my Aunt Lydia and Uncle Paul in the small town of Paylon.[4] So, we were surprised that we weren't welcome. As it turns out, criminals had kidnapped Uncle Paul and the town's women. At first they wouldn't cooperate with us and let us help, but they finally did and the criminals were brought to justice and everything worked out. I guess as Angels we're always destined to find crime.

            I got kidnapped by a crazy man who blamed Jill for the death of his son.[5] He was going to kill me so that she would feel the pain of loss. Needless to say, he didn't succeed. I'm glad, but I'm sorry for Jill. Dino Karazan was a good friend of hers. She's had too many losses this year. She doesn't deserve it. Then again, who does deserve bad things to happen to them? There are just too many bad guys in the world. 

  


* * *

[1] See episode 47 _Angels in Vegas_

[2] See episode 48 _Angel Come Home_

[3] See episode 56 _Angel on My Mind_

[4] See episode 59 _Angels on Vacation_

[5] See episode 63 _Angel in a Box_


	4. Another Year

Sabrina's gone. She's left the Agency. She's married and she's pregnant. I'll miss her, but I'm happy for her. Kelly and I both are. But there has to be three Angels, so we now welcome Tiffany Welles to the fold. Tiffany's from Boston. Her dad is Charlie's friend, so I had high hopes that we'd finally get to find out what Charlie looks like. You know, from a picture or a description or something. No dice. She said her father wouldn't tell her anything.  
  
It's just so unfair. Charlie says it's for our safety, but I'm sorry, it just really bugs me. What about Bosley's safety? What about the gaggle of women he's always hanging around with?  
  
Sorry. I went off on a tangent there. I didn't mean to. From what I can tell, Charlie's a good man and he really cares. I know he does. It just gets to me sometimes. Well, I'll forget about it for now.  
  
There's a new Angel to be broken in. I want to help Tiffany all I can. I remember well what it was like to be the new Angel. I want this to work out for her as well as it did for me.  
  
I'm hurt. Jill was back in town and she didn't even let me know. [1] It looks like she was involved with a shady character. I tried to help her in any way I could and I just got rebuked. As it turns out, she was setting up jewel thief Damien Roth for a fall. It was something that she and Charlie set up behind our backs. She says she couldn't tell me. I kind of understand, but. it still hurts. It just does. But I'm sure I'll get over it with time. She is my sister, after all.  
  
Jill just proved how good a sister she is. I had a difficult case. I went undercover in a prison to investigate possible corruption.[2] No backup or contacts. It was bad. It was very brutal inside. I was nearly killed. Obviously I wasn't, since I'm home writing this. But it scared me a lot. I tried to keep my cool, but they notice something was wrong and called Jill.[3] She came, but I didn't want to talk about it with her either. But she didn't give up.  
  
And you know what? We worked some things out, which was a big help to me. So, I learned some things. No matter how strong you think you are, you will need help and support at some point in your life. Possibly more than once. This doesn't make you weak, it makes you human. Not an unnecessary lesson for me. It wasn't easy to learn it, though. I suppose it's not an easy lesson for anybody.  
  
I had to go to Phoenix, Arizona for a case. I had to lore Vic Devlin back to California because our client is a bail bondsman who will lose his bond if Devlin doesn't return. He had been a jewel thief, but apparently he was much more than that. Charlie found out he was also wanted in the rape murders of three women. He told me to get off the case, but did I listen? Of course not. I had to finish the job, and I did. See, this job is a risk, and despite the dangers and needing to defy Charlie, I had to finish what I started. Charlie and the others weren't happy with me, and I guess in retrospect it was kind of stupid. But I did it. And I got out of their alive and brought him in. I just have to do what I have to do sometimes no matter what. I have to follow through.[4]  
  
I met someone unusual. I'll never forget Harrigan.[5] He's a detective, or at least he was one once. Very good in his day, but the bottle got him. So, I babysat him while Kel and Tiff worked the case. And I tried to keep him from drinking for a day. One day at a time, you know, that's the slogan. I don't know if he'll make it or if he'll even want to, but I tried at least. It's all up to him. There's no guarantee. You can only try.  
  
Jill got kidnapped because she was a witness to a robbery-murder. The hours waiting while the search went on were excruciating. But she's fine. She used her brains to outwit her captors and she was rescued. I don't think I'll ever be able to describe what I felt to know she was safe and when I saw her for the first time. I'm just very glad that my sister's okay. That's all I can say.[6]  
  
I never thought that anything would ever come between me and another Angel. I was wrong. When Kelly was suddenly proclaimed the long lost heir to a fortune, everything changed. She was identified as Margaret Barrows, granddaughter of Oliver Barrows, a very wealthy man. Bill Cord was the lawyer who identified her. They fell in love. Sounds simple enough, right? Not as simple as you might think. Oliver was murdered and Kelly called us for help in solving the case. We did. We also proved that Kelly was not Margaret. But it got complicated when I fell in love with Bill too. Then he was murdered as well. It was the worst thing in the world. I didn't know if I could get through it. I also didn't know if Kelly and I would ever mend our friendship. Falling in love with the same man tends to complicate things. However, we did. It wasn't easy, but we did. I'm glad it worked out because she does mean a lot to me. I just wish.well, never mind. What happened happened, and nothing can change that. Life goes on, and so will Kelly and I.[7]  
  
----------------------- [1] See episode 73: Fallen Angel  
  
[2] See episode 74: Caged Angel  
  
[3] See my story Little Lost Angel for more details (Please note my shameless display of self-promotion)  
  
[4] See episode 83: One of Our Angels is Missing  
  
[5] See episode 87: Harrigan's Angel  
  
[6] See episode 88: An Angel's Trail  
  
[7] See episodes 92 and 93: One Love.Two Angels (Parts 1&2) 


	5. Looking at the Past

Reflections: ch 5  
  
We've had a loss to the agency. Tiffany's decided to go back east. Perhaps California isn't for her. We had no time to find a replacement. So, on our next case, it'll just be me and Kelly. That'll be strange. I'm used to three and now we've got two. But I'm not afraid or anything. In the three years I've been here, a lot has changed. I've changed, too, I feel. I have proven myself to be far more capable that people thought. I am no longer just the little sister here. I know I'll probably always be that. It's fine as long as I'm also seen as more, and I think they finally do see me as more. For a while, I think I have been perceived as more.  
  
I'm thinking that Charlie will find us a new Angel eventually. Until then, though, we can handle it—Kelly and I. I believe that, and that's not an insignificant change.  
  
Well, we got a new Angel in a rather unusual way. We got a case, and it was just Kelly and me working it. It involved a modeling agency. Well, actually, we were hired to find a murderer, which we did. The guy was a client of the modeling agency. A lot of shady stuff was going down.[1]  
  
As I said, in the end it worked out. So, yeah, about our new Angel, Julie Rogers. She was one of the models. She was actually working undercover with the police, but of course we didn't know that at the time. She was a potential suspect. Charlie ran a background check on her. She came from a down-and-out background and had brushes with the law.  
  
But we ended up working with her to solve the case, and in the end, Charlie pulsed some strings to get her qualified to work with us. Not the most conventional way to hire an Angel, but it is working out well so far.  
  
My past came back to haunt me.[2] Remember that woman I mentioned before, that I arrested for prostitution when I was with the SFPD? Well, her husband and children hold her suicide against me, apparently.  
  
We were in Hawaii. Charlie opened a new office there, and we were there to get it started. The family lives on the island now, and I guess they got word that I was coming because they kidnapped me and were planning on killing me.  
  
I was scared, but I kept my head and I'm proud of that fact. Anyway, I found out a lot. Mary Granger (that was who she was) did have a lot of problems, one of which was that her husband beat her.  
  
I got away with the help of a psychic, if you can believe it. I know, it sounds weird. But I do believe it's true.  
  
Eleanor Willard didn't know any of us, and yet she helped lead Kelly, Bosley, and Julie to me. She had a hand in saving my life, I know it.  
  
Kelly got shot.[3] It was serious. For a while we didn't know if she'd make it or not. She did. I can't tell you what it's like to be in the position of not knowing whether someone you love will live or die. Awful doesn't even begin to cover it.  
  
But she did make it. She's going to be fine. Saying that that is a big relief would be a huge understatement.  
  
As I reflect on these past five years, I don't quite know what to say. It's been a joy being an Angel. I've worked with great people. I've had some great adventures. I can only hope that the next years are just as wonderful. I think they will be, but I can't know for sure, of course. All I know for sure is that whatever happens, I will be able to handle it. Sure, I'm the "little sister", but I'm also so much more than that. That's what being at the Agency has taught me. For that alone I am grateful, because it is a source of indescribable pride to me. It's worth a lot to know yourself, to really know yourself. And I do now.  
  
The End ----------------------- [1] See Episode 94: Angel In Hiding [2] See Episode 95: To See An Angel Die [3] See Episode 109: Let Our Angel Live 


End file.
